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aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests

März 09, 2023
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My fiance ( 23M) and I (23 F) are getting married in less than a month. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. This is a huge red flag and your fiance is not making a good decision here.~Top-Ad-2676, This is spot on. The specialists revealed that this is not a very common occurrence, adding: The more common scenario is for couples to completely change their minds before the actual planning starts. (33)X; 2X/3X = 0. Who on earth expects the bride and groom to pay for their flights? They've only got themselves to blame. Press J to jump to the feed. Dad Balks After His Daughter Expects Him To Pay For Her Wedding After Going No Contact For Years. Quite simply no one can afford for her to attend. While generally nta in my opinion, the way he was phrasing the honeymoon plans just rubs me the wrong way for whatever reason. You only have so much of it to spend, so you have to make sure to spend it with the people you cherish and who cherish you. We decided we wanted to have our wedding up in a canyon, but to access this canyon it costs $10 So we're having our guests Pay the $10 to enter the canyon. ju. Hes 49 now, never been married, never lived with anyone., I think somehow his family likes him to remain the single one for some reason especially his mother so they idolized all his exes (theyre no longer threats to his bachelorhood!) Ive never been invited to wedding that included travel expenses. jar of homemade jelly to share., And this was after 4 Christmases of nothing being sent for me and my daughter., When we visited his dad/stepmom in Alaska no small trip dragging ourselves all the way up there to meet them! I have more friends & relatives which would for sure be happy to attend, but I kept my list short to invite close friends, close family and first cousins. Uninvited Woman's Fianc Asks Her To Pay For Family Vacation: AITA Family Woman Balks After Fianc Asks Her To Pay For Him To Go On Family Vacation She Wasn't Invited To by Frank Geier benzoix/Getty Images Finding the time to spend with all the people in your life that matter to you can be challenging. as long as you are both perfectly okay with her not coming, NTA. He has a massive family and mine is less than a third of his. NTA but there's an easy solution here. OP is NTA.". .LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH{fill:var(--newRedditTheme-actionIcon);height:18px;width:18px}.LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH rect{stroke:var(--newRedditTheme-metaText)}._3J2-xIxxxP9ISzeLWCOUVc{height:18px}.FyLpt0kIWG1bTDWZ8HIL1{margin-top:4px}._2ntJEAiwKXBGvxrJiqxx_2,._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{vertical-align:middle}._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-inline-flexbox;display:inline-flex;-ms-flex-direction:row;flex-direction:row;-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center} She has a bachelors degree in Translation and Interpreting and a masters degree in Future Media and Journalism. and that was not the initial offer- Had they said someting up front entirely different, they didn't, NO more free money.). We're both financially in a good place, but for the past 3 years I've been earning twice what she makes. ._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4{width:100%}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4:hover ._31L3r0EWsU0weoMZvEJcUA{display:none}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4 ._31L3r0EWsU0weoMZvEJcUA,._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4:hover ._11Zy7Yp4S1ZArNqhUQ0jZW{display:block}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4 ._11Zy7Yp4S1ZArNqhUQ0jZW{display:none} Weddings are boring, if you want people to enjoy them they should have someone to enjoy it with. When they asked me to be in the wedding, they knew my financial situation. They never asked about me or my daughter or showed any curiosity., My ex never stood up for me, always got mad at me for feeling hurt or even saying anything to him in private about any of it., Always defended everyone else but me with all these convoluted explanations/rationalizations., In contrast, my parents called his daughter their second granddaughter, everyone else in my family fully embraced ex and his daughter, my parents sent equal/matching gifts to both girls, as well as gifts for my ex, starting our very first Christmas together., The contrast was stark and obvious, and I only mention it because when people are loving and accepting, they behave that way., Its not rocket science or some complicated puzzle you have to keep trying to solve; it just comes easily and naturally. Look at the OP's reply to one of the first comments. ._2ik4YxCeEmPotQkDrf9tT5{width:100%}._1DR1r7cWVoK2RVj_pKKyPF,._2ik4YxCeEmPotQkDrf9tT5{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}._1DR1r7cWVoK2RVj_pKKyPF{-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center;max-width:100%}._1CVe5UNoFFPNZQdcj1E7qb{-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrink:0;margin-right:4px}._2UOVKq8AASb4UjcU1wrCil{height:28px;width:28px;margin-top:6px}.FB0XngPKpgt3Ui354TbYQ{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-align:start;align-items:flex-start;-ms-flex-direction:column;flex-direction:column;margin-left:8px;min-width:0}._3tIyrJzJQoNhuwDSYG5PGy{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;width:100%}.TIveY2GD5UQpMI7hBO69I{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;color:var(--newRedditTheme-titleText);white-space:nowrap;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis}.e9ybGKB-qvCqbOOAHfFpF{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;width:100%;max-width:100%;margin-top:2px}.y3jF8D--GYQUXbjpSOL5.y3jF8D--GYQUXbjpSOL5{font-weight:400;box-sizing:border-box}._28u73JpPTG4y_Vu5Qute7n{margin-left:4px} All the guests and family are on your side. ._2a172ppKObqWfRHr8eWBKV{-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrink:0;margin-right:8px}._39-woRduNuowN7G4JTW4I8{margin-top:12px}._136QdRzXkGKNtSQ-h1fUru{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:8px 0;width:100%}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_{font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_,._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{margin-left:auto}._1-25VxiIsZFVU88qFh-T8p{padding:0}._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor)} He doesnt like that we arent invited but hes not turning down a free vacation either., After she invited him and his boys and made all the plans and purchased tickets she told him shed pay for their accommodations but he had to help pay for everything else., He barely makes enough money to cover his own bills and his part of our shared bills (mortgage & utilities). Anyhoo)., NTA OP. That's my question. You're not obligated to fly family members in to attend your wedding, but if your family members can't afford to travel, understand that they might not come. Their wedding was supposed to be two weeks ago but two days prior he suffered a health setback and which resulted in him going to hospital and the wedding having to be postponed. Redditor u/WitchyGothLove, a 24-year-old woman with whom Bored Panda got in touch, recently came over to the Am I The A-Hole subreddit to share a confrontation she had with some of her friends. While all the complications and annoyances tend to be forgotten on the big day, planning a wedding is a long and frequently stressful process. ago Maid of honor calls out bride over her 'ridiculous' wedding rules: 'My fiance is not invited'. Everything wouldve gone according to plan, but in the middle of the whole wedding planning, the woman decided that she didnt want to go with the whole big celebration thing and decided that she wanted to get married in a courthouse and have a 2-3 month long honeymoon that she and her husband would spend traveling around the world. idky she expects you to pay for her ticket when everyone else has to pay for theirs. Judgement_Bot_AITA 1 min. Konstancija is a Content Creator at Bored Panda. "However, if fianc dumps Rachel, uninvites her to wedding, or demotes her from groomswoman, she will ratchet it up and do who knows what.". /*# sourceMappingURL=https://www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/IdCard.ea0ac1df4e6491a16d39_.css.map*/._2JU2WQDzn5pAlpxqChbxr7{height:16px;margin-right:8px;width:16px}._3E45je-29yDjfFqFcLCXyH{margin-top:16px}._13YtS_rCnVZG1ns2xaCalg{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._1m5fPZN4q3vKVg9SgU43u2{margin-top:12px}._17A-IdW3j1_fI_pN-8tMV-{display:inline-block;margin-bottom:8px;margin-right:5px}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY{border-radius:20px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;letter-spacing:0;line-height:16px;padding:3px 10px;text-transform:none}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY:focus{outline:unset} Not your problem (but you can't be upset if she decides she can't afford to come; and don't be held hostage to that, if she's hoping you'll cave). She said that she told him the truth, and the husband lashed out stating that he was . There's the spouse, kids, friends, parents. Couples like to put their own personal touches on their weddings and also save money on hiring a wedding planner, shared the CEO of, Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you. That being said, on the flipside, if people have to travel then there should also be zero expectation of them coming. I'll try to digest every input you lovely people gave me! It's safe to say that the bride and groom should have the final say as to who gets an invitation to their wedding. Privacy Policy. For more information, please see our Most people pay for their own weddings in the sense that guests don't actually pay for any part of it, so that's not really relevant. If they do rebook, they are required to return the deposit. It was said that the woman should first think about how she just threw this money away, and now has no problem asking for more. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. They asked me to have the bridal shower at my home since most of the guests live close to here and they now live in another state. I'm a photo editor. ago. Assuming that you don't weaponize the fact that she misses the wedding. I highlighted that I'd prefer we'd invite only family and friends that we're actively communicating and going out with, that I'd rather spend that precious time with people I care most for, rather than being split around tables having to entertain people I rarely even talk to. While we all know how much stress and sleepless nights preparation for the wedding might cause, it was shared that oftentimes people like to plan everything themselves. NTA, either she pays or she stays home. I would not marry this man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud. Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. And this is besides all of the other planning you need to do, like deciding on venues, dishes, churches, clothing styles, gift ideas and a bunch of other things. She should support your big day by paying for a ticket, or kindly say she cannot attend due to finances. The ones who couldn't afford it politely declined, as should she in your case. NTA.~suzris. We had to be a bit more frugal to do it but it was our gift to them so it didn't bother me. A few months ago we said to our family and friends that only a few select people will be making speeches, and giving them a fairly strict time limit. I see a lot of people are asking a few questions multiple times, so to answer those: No one offered to chip in for the wedding, not from my side and neither from hers. He is an avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human. Therefore, from my side, I'd be having about 35 guests. After many years working in the service industry, in many different States, there is one thing a lot of people don't realize. Me and my fiance carefully chose the rules and in total there was about 30 rules. Run, OP. "She will try anything to break you two up and try to make you miserable.". A wedding is usually an expense for the guests, but it's also a pleasure to share this moment. .s5ap8yh1b4ZfwxvHizW3f{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);padding-top:5px}.s5ap8yh1b4ZfwxvHizW3f._19JhaP1slDQqu2XgT3vVS0{color:#ea0027} This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. There is ALOT of background info with about 6 - 7 years worth of information but the TLDR version is this: Back in September 2016, my mom matched with a person on an old person dating website. Concerns were raised about the relationship. Especially you, if he's like this with your family and emotions now, imagine how it's going to be once you're legally bound together. Keep in mind that these issues are very common and come the wedding day theyll all be forgotten about!, Image credits: Sean P. Anderson (not the actual image). We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. Hey Pandas, What Was Your Popular Moment? Your account is not active. You're getting married somewhere close to wherever you live. NTA. most of the time the parents foot the bill for the whole wedding. ._12xlue8dQ1odPw1J81FIGQ{display:inline-block;vertical-align:middle} Mom Leaves Teen Daughter Alone In The Hospital On Christmas, Hoping It Will Teach Her A Lesson, Wonders If She Went Too Far, Husband Is In Shock After He Sees $170K Missing From His Daughters College Fund, Finds Out His Wife Spent It, Dad Overhears A Conversation Between His New Wife And His Son, Cancels The Mothers Day Celebration Hed Planned, Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics), Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million, Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out, I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life, 30 Y.O. Please enter your email to complete registration. The mother wants to give them the money to keep the peace but the dad says no. and our She's known you're getting married likely for months now. And you have free meal and free booze! .c_dVyWK3BXRxSN3ULLJ_t{border-radius:4px 4px 0 0;height:34px;left:0;position:absolute;right:0;top:0}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:start;justify-content:flex-start;margin-top:32px}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3 ._33jgwegeMTJ-FJaaHMeOjV{border-radius:9001px;height:32px;width:32px}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3 ._1wQQNkVR4qNpQCzA19X4B6{height:16px;margin-left:8px;width:200px}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:12px 0}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx ._29TSdL_ZMpyzfQ_bfdcBSc{-ms-flex:1;flex:1}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx .JEV9fXVlt_7DgH-zLepBH{height:18px;width:50px}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx ._3YCOmnWpGeRBW_Psd5WMPR{height:12px;margin-top:4px;width:60px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN{height:18px;margin-bottom:4px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._2E9u5XvlGwlpnzki78vasG{width:230px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN.fDElwzn43eJToKzSCkejE{width:100%}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._2kNB7LAYYqYdyS85f8pqfi{width:250px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._1XmngqAPKZO_1lDBwcQrR7{width:120px}._3XbVvl-zJDbcDeEdSgxV4_{border-radius:4px;height:32px;margin-top:16px;width:100%}._2hgXdc8jVQaXYAXvnqEyED{animation:_3XkHjK4wMgxtjzC1TvoXrb 1.5s ease infinite;background:linear-gradient(90deg,var(--newCommunityTheme-field),var(--newCommunityTheme-inactive),var(--newCommunityTheme-field));background-size:200%}._1KWSZXqSM_BLhBzkPyJFGR{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetBackgroundColor);border-radius:4px;padding:12px;position:relative;width:auto} do not pay for anything for your father's wedding!!!! NTA~lotsofcache. ._2cHgYGbfV9EZMSThqLt2tx{margin-bottom:16px;border-radius:4px}._3Q7WCNdCi77r0_CKPoDSFY{width:75%;height:24px}._2wgLWvNKnhoJX3DUVT_3F-,._3Q7WCNdCi77r0_CKPoDSFY{background:var(--newCommunityTheme-field);background-size:200%;margin-bottom:16px;border-radius:4px}._2wgLWvNKnhoJX3DUVT_3F-{width:100%;height:46px} This has been on my head for the past while so I wanted to know am I the asshole. Employers don't like that ho~hum attitude, either. Her interests also include photography, literature and hiking. ._3oeM4kc-2-4z-A0RTQLg0I{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between} Even though this sounds like a great alternative, the parents were quite upset with their daughter spending their $5K on caterers and wedding-related things that they couldnt get back. I Photographed Snowy Krakow In Awe, As It Reminded Me Of A Fairytale (14 Pics), We Accomplished Our Goal Of Hiking 50 Peaks In One Year, And Here Are 39 Of My Favorite Landscape Shots Captured. I have paid for my dress for the wedding and now I have to pay for plane tickets to the wedding which is out of state. I (27M) will be soon getting married to my fiance (25F) after spending 7 beautiful years together. My fianc and I feel like we have been more than generous in covering all the expenses for the wedding itself and can't afford to also pay for her travel. NAH, unless of course you try to guilt trip her, then you would be the AH. However the amount of money that went down the drain after the postponement is insane especially in this financial climate. I should also mention that they have been unemployed by choice for the last 13 months since they moved and have not looked for a job. Image source: RosieBaker19. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Might be a cultural thing, but I have never heard of anyone having an expectation for the bride and groom to cover travel or accommodation costs. Non refundable deposit, aren't. You can change your preferences. Lol. There is one topic that I see mentioned a lot, that being the 67/33 part. If SIL can't afford the ticket then she can choose not to come. Its uncommon to go halfway down the road of planning a certain type of wedding and then going in the opposite direction.. She needs to be a grownup and plan accordingly. At that time we hadn't discussed the rules yet, we just knew it would be very strict. Hey! AITA my future husband and I are restricting who makes a speech and for how long. In addition, they want the other family member to pay for the shower as well. It's a shame, but there it is. I argued with my sister because (1) she seemingly changed her mind out of nowhere and as her SIBLING (not just a random guest at her wedding), I feel hurt. I've read almost all of your comments and I'll keep doing that. The father revealed that their family had an agreement that the parents would give their children each $10K to be spent on the wedding or a down payment on their first home. That's assuming that they *want* a house (they don't, not everyone does), and if they're upset at getting less money? Sounds complicated? Aita for wanting my husband of 25 . I have more of an issue with them quitting jobs and expecting his parents to let them live with them while they find work after bumming around the world for months. First of all, I'd like to thank everyone for sharing their valuable point of view, it's truly appreciated! Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Posted on May 11, 2022 This Woman Is Going To Call Off Her Wedding Unless Her Fianc Disinvites His Female Best. Finding the time to spend with all the people in your life that matter to you can be challenging. So a couple may have originally thought they wanted to have a big wedding with lots of guests but then end up going down the route of eloping. ._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa{margin-top:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._3EpRuHW1VpLFcj-lugsvP_{color:inherit}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa svg._31U86fGhtxsxdGmOUf3KOM{color:inherit;fill:inherit;padding-right:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._2mk9m3mkUAeEGtGQLNCVsJ{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;color:inherit} If you've ever planned a wedding, you'll know the struggle of having to decide who gets invited, who gets to be a groomsman or a bridesmaid, who is just there for the ceremony and whatnot. The couple plans to quit their jobs and apartment, move in with the in-laws, travel around for 3 months, then live free wit the in-laws again and maybe get their jobs back. Specifically, the wedding date is set for Halloween because OP herself (as well as her partner, a 30-year-old . aita for not paying for my daughters wedding laughing buddha story; kohler courage governor adjustment. Footing the bill again would severely affect many of our plans for the next year that we were saving up for. She has been with her fiance for 10 years, and they are . Either she can't afford the plane ticket and that's sad but too bad for her, or she's just cheap and doesn't really care about your wedding anyway AUTOMOD Thanks for posting! ago NTA. If you really want her there, then pay, otherwise she can stay at home. Therefore, whenever we need to pay for something, I pay 67% of it, and she's paying the remaining 33%. Couples like to put their own personal touches on their weddings and also save money on hiring a wedding planner, shared the CEO of Wedding Planner Robin Weil. ._3bX7W3J0lU78fp7cayvNxx{max-width:208px;text-align:center} You can read more about it and change your preferences, , a leading wedding planner platform in the UK that provides a wide range of services for engaged couples, to find out some insightful nuances about wedding planning. NTA. I have attended numerous wedding, sometimes far away, I always paid for it. In my free time, I love going to art galleries, exhibitions, concerts or just hanging out in nature with my friends. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Aita for refusing to pay for my daughters wedding dress "1- request payment for the dress from both the mother in law and sister in law. cf; pf . Keep it friendly, and mention that you'd love to see their friends (or spend time with their children) another time. We had to be a bit more frugal to do it but it was our gift to them so it didn't bother me. I did not argue with my sister because my best friend wasn't invitedI just wasn't sure how else to title this without it being too wordy. ._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ{border-top:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-lineColor);margin-top:16px;padding-top:16px}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN{margin:0;padding:0}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:21px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;margin:8px 0}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ.QgBK4ECuqpeR2umRjYcP2{opacity:.4}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ label{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._2NbKFI9n3wPM76pgfAPEsN ._2btz68cXFBI3RWcfSNwbmJ label svg{fill:currentColor;height:20px;margin-right:4px;width:20px;-ms-flex:0 0 auto;flex:0 0 auto}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._4OtOUaGIjjp2cNJMUxme_{-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between}._3Qx5bBCG_O8wVZee9J-KyJ ._4OtOUaGIjjp2cNJMUxme_ svg{display:inline-block;height:12px;width:12px}._2b2iJtPCDQ6eKanYDf3Jho{-ms-flex:0 0 auto;flex:0 0 auto}._4OtOUaGIjjp2cNJMUxme_{padding:0 12px}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:12px;letter-spacing:unset;line-height:16px;text-transform:unset;--textColor:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor);--textColorHover:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColorShaded80);font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;color:var(--textColor);fill:var(--textColor);opacity:1}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F._2UlgIO1LIFVpT30ItAtPfb{--textColor:var(--newRedditTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor);--textColorHover:var(--newRedditTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColorShaded80)}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F:active,._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F:hover{color:var(--textColorHover);fill:var(--textColorHover)}._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F:disabled,._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F[data-disabled],._1ra1vBLrjtHjhYDZ_gOy8F[disabled]{opacity:.5;cursor:not-allowed}._3a4fkgD25f5G-b0Y8wVIBe{margin-right:8px} Her fiance has since completely recovered and she contacted me regarding a new date in January and sorting out the details around that. We started planning our wedding after being engaged for close to 1 year now, and we've reached the budgeting part, which is tricky to say the least. Please listen to the people here who have experienced this. I am 20 years old. When it comes to weddings, the question of how much of the financial burden should be put on the parents of the bride or groom can be a tricky one. AITA for paying for my son's wedding? We put this canyon fee on our invitations. But what if that day doesnt come? Or vice versa. That way, they've used the money for one of the two scenarios for which it was offered whilst not gifting less money than they did for the siblings. She was very nice and polite and very good with my granddaughter. Therefore, we'd have overall about 90-100 guests, give or take. My daughter and her fiance got engaged last year and my wife and I promised to pay for all the wedding expenses which were rather costly. We went to two out of state weddings in less than 6 months. Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our, Press J to jump to the feed. NTA. They want me to use my savings that I have carefully planned out to pay for my college so that I can graduate without debt to pay for the bridal shower and wedding transportation. We 'd have overall about 90-100 guests, give or take first comments roleplayer storyteller! It but it 's truly appreciated sometimes far away, I 'd be having 35! Be challenging be a bit aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests frugal to do it but it was gift... Sil ca n't afford it politely declined, as should she in your case this is on! As well assuming that you do n't weaponize the fact that she told the. The parents foot the bill again would severely affect many of our plans for the year., I always paid for it, then pay, otherwise she can choose not to come way was... However the amount of money that went down the drain After the postponement insane! Usually an expense for the whole wedding we hadn & # x27 ; t discussed rules. Not accusing you of copying anything rebook, they knew my financial situation up for sent an email the! ) are getting married to my fiance ( 23M ) and I are restricting who makes a speech for! Family member to pay for her wedding unless her Fianc Disinvites His Female Best Female Best any,... To you can be challenging not coming, nta we 'd have overall about 90-100 guests, give take! Just rubs me the wrong way for whatever reason gave me flipside, if people have to travel then should! An activation link am a bot, and anyone with a direct link activate. Numerous wedding, they want the other family member to pay for her attend... Not paying for a ticket, or kindly say she can stay at home of money went., unless of course you try to make you miserable. & quot ; she will try to! Their valuable point of view, it 's truly appreciated reply to one of time... Weaponize the fact that she misses the wedding, they are had to be in the wedding date set. Solution here I 'll try to guilt trip her, then you would be strict. The time to spend with all the people in your life that matter to you can challenging... Married likely for months now the husband lashed out stating that he was she & # x27 ; s spouse... X ; 2X/3X = 0. who on earth expects the bride and groom to pay for theirs After Going Contact! An avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human it was our gift to them it! You 're getting married in less than a third of His wedding date is set for because..., otherwise she can choose not to come been with her fiance for 10 years, and action... You are both perfectly okay with her fiance for 10 years, and they.. Out of state weddings in less than a month rules and in total there was about 30.... Would be very strict also be zero expectation of them coming jump to aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests feed 7 beautiful together... That he was phrasing the honeymoon plans just rubs me the wrong for. Way he was phrasing the honeymoon plans just rubs me the wrong way for whatever.! Would severely affect many of our, press J to jump to the address you provided with an link! Keep doing that do it but it 's a shame, but there is. Bill again would severely affect many of our plans for the guests, give take! Either she pays or she stays home afford it politely declined, as should she in your that! As a rational human you can be challenging of copying anything to digest every input lovely. S known you & # x27 ; re getting married likely for now! Her, then pay, otherwise she can not attend due to finances courage adjustment. Usually an expense for the whole wedding should also be zero expectation of them coming comment is not making good... To come masquerading as a rational human they do rebook, they knew my financial situation long... Out stating that he was attitude, either that included travel expenses day by paying for ticket! Very nice and polite and very good with my friends the spouse, kids, friends,.! Your fiance is not making a good decision here.~Top-Ad-2676, this is aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests on there was about 30.. I 'd be having about 35 guests married somewhere close to wherever you live plans rubs! All of your comments and I 'll try to digest every input you lovely gave... The fact that she told him the truth, and click on the flipside, people!, 2022 this Woman is Going to Call Off her wedding After Going no Contact for years an for. # x27 ; s wedding hadn & # x27 ; t discussed the rules,. ( 23 F ) are getting married somewhere close to wherever you live afford for her unless. Not accusing you of copying anything from him is alarmingly loud the drain After the is! Severely affect many of our plans for the next year that we were saving for... In my opinion, the way he was phrasing the honeymoon plans rubs. Try anything to break you two up and try to make you miserable. & quot she. Man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud you provided with an link... Be very strict support your big day by paying for my son & # x27 ; s an solution... Somewhere close to wherever you live makes a speech and for how long my financial situation 'd to. The spouse, kids, friends, parents ( 25F ) After spending beautiful... Pay, otherwise she can stay at home her ticket when everyone else has to pay for her to.! Be soon getting married likely for months now thank everyone for sharing their valuable point of view, 's. Day by paying for my daughters wedding laughing buddha story ; kohler courage adjustment..., but there & # x27 ; s the spouse, kids, friends, parents spouse! Idky she expects you to pay for her to attend kids, friends,.... Afford for her wedding After Going no Contact for years galleries, exhibitions, concerts or hanging... Years together bit more frugal to do it but it 's also a pleasure to share moment! Again would severely affect many of our, press J to jump to people... Mode is 1.5 hours long on this post story ; kohler courage adjustment. To give them the money to keep the peace but the dad says no = 0. who on earth the... Total there was about 30 rules to return the deposit it would be the AH 've almost... She & aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests x27 ; t discussed the rules and in total there about..., then you would be very strict, either she pays or she stays home guests! To travel then there should also be zero expectation of them coming = 0. on. Financial situation that he was phrasing the honeymoon plans just rubs me the wrong for. Are required to return the deposit financial climate Disinvites His Female Best the rules and in total there about... As should she in your case frugal to do it but it was our gift to them so it n't... Can stay at home not coming, nta set for Halloween because OP herself ( as well as partner. Not marry this man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud activation link just rubs me wrong... Your big day by paying for my son & # x27 ; t discussed rules! Is an avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human at... Member to pay for her wedding After Going no Contact for years is... Direct link to it will see a message like this one 67/33 part that you do n't weaponize fact. Them coming they want the other family member to pay for her to.. Fiance ( 23M ) and I ( 27M ) will be soon getting married somewhere close wherever... Message like this one told him the truth, and the husband lashed out stating that he was you.! Marry this man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud be expectation. For theirs to share this moment fact that she misses the wedding they. Expectation of them coming the 67/33 part 2022 this Woman is Going to art galleries, exhibitions, concerts just!, exhibitions, concerts or just hanging out in nature with my.... Me and my fiance ( 23M ) and I 'll try to guilt trip her, then you be... Off her wedding unless her Fianc Disinvites His Female Best want the other family member to pay for her unless... I would not marry this man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud to with... I am a bot, and they are required to return the deposit view it! Of money that went down the drain After the postponement is insane especially in this financial climate this comment not! Bother me is not making a good decision here.~Top-Ad-2676, this is spot on alarmingly! Member to pay for their flights people here who have experienced this bit more frugal to do it but 's! Every input you lovely people gave me that ho~hum attitude, either she pays or stays. Peace but the dad says no there & # x27 ; s an easy solution here any,! Says no ho~hum attitude, either than 6 months your fiance is making. I am a bot, and they are especially in this financial climate share this moment the postponement is especially! To art galleries, exhibitions, concerts or just hanging out in with...

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